I wondered why I am so calm. And then it dawned on me: The emotions most people are going through right now I dealt with last summer, once I decided to carry out our surprise child. I knew another pregnancy most likely would “lock” me inside our apartment for several months, unable to use my legs, take away my nature walks and my ability to travel. The last two pregnancies had brought me physically and mentally to my limits. I took down my vision board and threw it into the corner of my closet, behind the beautiful dresses I wouldn’t be able to wear for at least another year. I grieved the events I had planned and the events I had put into my calendar to attend. And after a weekend of crying and anger and sadness I surrendered. It was a weekend filled with conversations with the Universe/Spirit/Source/Life/Love/the Divine/[enter your favourite term here] and one of the conversations went like this: „I had so many things planned to do my Soulwork. Going through this pregnancy fully embodied (not pulling out of my body like I did with the ones before when the pain got too much) will mean I don’t have any energy left to give. I will need to stop working completely.“ „There are others who will do the work that needs to be done. Don’t worry, you‘ll be needed again when it’s time. Carrying this baby is part of your Soulwork too, you know. He has always been part of your path. The judgement around what is and what isn’t important comes from you, not me.” “Ok. I accept this divine assignment. What do I need to do to stay sane and not only survive, but thrive in the coming months?” „Practice devotion: devote every moment to Life flowing through you. Every action and interaction is your Soulwork. No more judging.“ Over the next two months this message to stop judging was delivered to me several times, especially around „rest“ and „relax“ not being enough on my divine to-do-list. Two of my friends/mentors/teachers, Asha and Rhiannon, reminded me more than once that deep rest was the only thing I needed and why I judged it so hard. During Rhiannon’s Sacred Rest Retreat in France I realised how tired my Soul was, how much I had given over the last years and how much I actually needed the rest forced on me through the pregnancy. When I came home my Crohn’s flared up, I stopped all my work immediately and I rested. For three long months I rested. Listened. Sat in stillness. Cared for my body. And stopped judging. I learned that I didn’t need to do anything to be in service to the Divine. And now I’m ready to teach it. May your life be filled with Flow,

Annika x