Paaaaancakes...I bet you are doing them wrong! Today was filled with loads of laughs and silly family time. Laughing with my family recharges me so much. The moment in the picture above happened just a minute after my 4 year old put a pancake on his arm and said: “Look at my arm mum, I’m pancake man.” What followed was my trained response: “Put that pancake back on the plate, we don’t play with food.” I saw his little hurt face and recognised my “that’s-just-how-it-is” voice. For a moment I wished I could take the words back. But we all know that‘s not possible. So I checked myself: Is this still true for me? I play with food regularly, I arrange fruit in Mandalas, I paint pictures into my pastasauce and we build mash castles and volcanoes filled with gravy and decorated with bean trees. We call raspberries fingerberries because we stick them onto our fingers and pretend they are hats and we are the giants eating them. Try it, it’s so much fun! So what I just said was a) a lie, b) super confusing for my son and c) hurt him because of the harsh tone I said it in.
I reached out to him, mending the hurt I just caused. I said: “On the other hand you are totally right, it looks like skin. I bet it would make an awesome scary mask!” His eyes lit up, he smiled and I held the pancake so he could bite a hole for his tongue to stick out. And we giggled, my husband Dennis took pictures and the little one joined in as well. It felt so good PLUS gave me great awareness if I ever catch myself saying “We don’t play with food” again.
What lies are we telling ourselves just because “that’s just how it is”? How much joy, fun, connection and pleasure do we deny ourselves because of rules our parents, grandparents and their parents decided on/were trained on? Listen closely to the things you say and make up your own rules, after all it’s your life my love!
Sending you much Love&Light,